'Takers' Movie Review

Takers is in the running for the most unintentionally funny film of 2010. The very definition of a cheesy B movie, Takers throws every action film cliche at the screen. Unfortunately that ploy doesn't pay off as half the time you can't actually tell what's happening on the screen. Why? Because once again a filmmaker has opted to use the shaky cam to the point of distraction/nausea, zooming in and out of shaky close-ups and always seeming to be a frame behind where the action really is.

However, for all of its shaky cam faults, there are a handful of truly fantastic chase scenes that almost make up for the remainder of Takers. In particular there's a Parkour-style chase sequence through downtown streets, office buildings, and a hotel kitchen that could go toe-to-toe with any of the chase sequences from any of the Bourne movies. The camera actually flows fairly fluidly following Chris Brown as he tries to shake off two cops (played by Matt Dillon and Jay Hernandez). And although in real life Brown's character would have multiple broken bones along with shredded skin and a massive concussion, it's during this chase scene that you can see what director John Luessenhop was going for with Takers. Yet overall this is an uneven rookie effort that generates laughs when it's going for gasps.

First time feature film writer/director John Luessenhop seems to be borrowing from better heist films in his attempt at creating some excitement for audiences who aren't looking for anything other than spectacular action sequences. The Expendables also did this, however it did it much better. If that film hadn't separated the action scenes with lengthy scenes of dialogue, The Expendables would have been the perfect smash 'em up, mindless action film of the summer of 2010. Takers actually has better dialogue than The Expendables, delivered by actors of just about the same skill level (with the exception of Idris Elba who easily outdoes anyone The Expendables has to offer with his ability to make silk out of a sow's ear). But someone with a little more knowledge of staging an action film was needed at the helm of Takers.

The Story

Idris Elba stars as Gordon, the leader of a gang of skilled robbers who never rush jobs, always do their homework, and don't mind blowing up stuff in order to score large amounts of cash. And of course his gang's made up of colorful characters. Brothers Jesse (Chris Brown) and Jake (Michael Ealy) have differing opinions on how to handle their jailbird father. John (Paul Walker) is Gordon's closest friend and confidante, a steadying force and the voice of reason. And AJ (Hayden Christensen) is a hat-loving fashion plate whose job it is to handle all the explosives.

An ex-member of the crew, Ghost (Tip TI Harris), just got out of jail after serving a lengthy sentence for one of their robberies. He's got a hot tip about an armored car carrying millions, but the gang's leery about A) trusting him, B) whether he actually has the inside scoop, and C) pulling off a job so soon after their last bank heist and with only a week to get the layout of the land and set everything up. But despite their misgivings, they go ahead with the heist because the money's just too huge to say no to.

But when a job sounds to good to be, it is - that's just the way of the world. And when Russians, jealousy over a lost girlfriend, and two cops who put together the pieces of the puzzle at an incredibly swift pace are all working against the gang, their long streak of successful robberies may just be coming to an end.

The Acting

Matt Dillon scowls and looks menacing as a tough cop who likes to use brute force when it might not be necessary. But even given such a one-dimensional character to play, Dillon manages to pull off a little something special. Elba's also terrific, though he deserves better than this. The rest of the cast is as about what you'd expect from this sort of film. Some ham it up (particularly the ones who have minimal acting credits to their names), some opt for just one expression and stick with that come hell or high water, and the rest simply go along for the ride. Physically, every member of the ensemble does handle their role well, but there's never any one of the bunch you care what happens to in the end.

The Bottom Line

If you can handle the shaky cam and stick around to the final act, you'll be treated to the reason why I started this review with the claim Takers is one of the most unintentionally funny films of the year. Because during the final act Takers takes a tragic turn, attempting to pull off some serious moments that don't blend well with the overall tone of the film. You'll know you've arrived in the land of bizarre when the film inserts operatic, lilting background music to accompany shoot-outs. Cue the music, cue the laughter. Takers turns from a semi-entertaining action film into something so bizarre, so tonally wrong that it's impossible to imagine the scenes were meant to be played straight.

There's a scene toward the end of the film in which two members of the crew opt to go out in a blaze of glory. This scene was so ill-conceived and poorly executed that a guy up front in the audience - and this was a regular crowd with a scattering of film critics - actually yelled out, 'Boo!' His reaction was greeted not with calls to be quiet but with applause. And that, my friend, says everything.

GRADE: C-

Takers was directed by John Luessenhop PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, a sexual situation/partial nudity.

Theatrical Release: August 27, 2010

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