'Jonah Hex' Movie Review

Given a better script, Jonah Hex could have been great summer entertainment - or at the least a passable way to spend a hot summer evening. Instead, although there are a few scattered laughs (mainly in the first half of the film before the ludicrous insertion of a weapon of mass destruction) and Josh Brolin is terrific in the lead, Jonah Hex is a major disappointment. It plays out like an extended trailer for the real film that lies buried under the burden of a PG-13 rating.

The Story

Jonah Hex fought for the South in the Civil War, not because he supported slavery but because he's against the government bossing him around. And after being a good soldier, Jonah says enough is enough when his commanding officer, Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich), wants him to engage in morally reprehensible acts against the United States involving the deaths of innocent civilians. This, and the fact Jonah kills his son, infuriates Turnbull and it's not long before revenge is taken. Turnbull turns up at Jonah's house and along with his gang of thugs - led by a nasty character named Burke (Michael Fassbender) - they force Jonah to watch his wife and young son die a horrific, fiery death. Turnbull leaves Jonah tied up to die but not before branding his face with 'QT' so Jonah will always remember who did this to him.

Indians help save him and now Jonah walks the earth not as an immortal but as one who has visited the other side and lived to tell about it. His near death experience has left him with the ability to commune with the dead, an ability he uses to become a successful bounty hunter. But the table's turned and he becomes one of the hunted after killing lawmen who tried to cheat him out of his due for bringing in bad guys. Still, all he really wants is to make sure Turnbull and his men pay for what they did to his family.

Jonah Hex works when it's concentrating on the bounty hunter for the first half an hour, but then it throws in a bizarre plot twist involving an 'ultimate weapon' Turnbull wants to use to wipe out all of America. With Turnbull ready to do whatever it is he has up his sleeve on the 4th of July, Jonah's commissioned by the government - the same people who had a bounty on his head - to track down Turnbull and stop him before the terrorist can use this secret weapon against thousands celebrating the country's independence. And since finding and killing Turnbull is the reason Jonah's still walking the earth, this is one instance he and the government are completely on the same side.

Jonah Hex - The Good

Josh Brolin. Brolin works the scar instead of letting the scar work him. The fact half his face is disguised under a grotesque makeup job doesn't stop Brolin from making this conflicted man someone we can root for. He snarls well, sits atop a horse as if he was born to ride, and has perfect timing when delivering the few decent lines in the film. And his fight scenes show Brolin's fine playing an action hero. The Western tone of Jonah Hex suits him, which bodes well for his starring role in the Coen Brothers' remake of True Grit.

Standouts among the supporting cast include Michael Fassbender, who actually makes for a better villain than John Malkovich. Malkovich is okay, but he's playing a one-dimensional character and doesn't add any special Malkovich-ish twist to it (and the weird Benjamin Franklin hair doesn't help). Jeffrey Dean Morgan's also terrific in his short scene with Brolin, playing Malkovich's deceased son in a more lively fashion than some of his fellow actors who aren't supposed to be playing dead. In fact, given his time onscreen and the scene's critical importance to the film overall, it's actually bizarre Morgan's not pushed as one of the main supporting players.

Jonah Hex - The Bad

The finger of blame can be pointed directly at the script by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor (Crank) which is a red-hot mess. We flit between scenes without any time to connect, and without any logical progression in some cases. Characters show up for a minute or two, serve up some exposition, and then disappear. And what's really irritating is that the more interesting the character, the less time we get to spend with him (Morgan's character, Jeb Turnbull, is at the head of the entertaining and under-used line). Instead, the least interesting characters get repeat appearances, including Wes Bentley's whatever it is he's playing and Megan Fox's prostitute.

Brolin has better chemistry with the dog who becomes his traveling companion than he does with Fox, though they both do try to convey a connection. Because there's no chemistry there, and because that portion of the storyline is horribly underwritten, it's impossible to understand the relationship between Fox's Lilah and Brolin's Jonah. And, once again, 99% of what Fox is asked to do is pose rather than act. Or maybe that wasn't what was asked of her here but rather what she brought to the role. I've given Fox the benefit of the doubt with her previous films (Transformers, Transformers 2, How to Lose Friends and Alienate People, Jennifer's Body) because all she really had to do in any of those was look gorgeous. But this time around she really needs to show some genuine emotion and reach out to the audience, and she just falls short. Although, to cut her the tiniest bit of slack, director Jimmy Hayward (Horton Hears a Who!) has her staring at her reflection in the mirror for no real reason and for an extended period of time, a scene which elicited snickers from the preview audience I saw it with. It's as if he's confirming it's okay to take her as just another pretty face.

The plot leaves much to be desired and the second half doesn't live up to the film's solid beginnings. The ultimate weapon idea just doesn't cut it. Introducing a weapon of mass destruction may have sounded like a good idea to the writers, but not even Brolin's performance can overcome the silliness that ensues once that's been introduced into the story.

And finally, if you want us to take a character seriously, don't cast Will Arnett to play the role. The audience laughed the second he came onscreen, and he's playing one of the few characters who's supposed to be dead serious.

Jonah Hex - The Bottom Line

Although it's got the shortest running time of anything we've seen all year, Jonah Hex doesn't feel so much snappily paced as it does rushed and disjointed. The tone shifts all over the place, from spaghetti Western to screwball comedy to action thriller, trying on and casting off different approaches without ever finding its footing. And that's the film's major downfall - writers Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor don't seem to have ever figured out exactly what sort of Jonah Hex movie they were trying to write, and that indecision shows on the screen.

GRADE: C- (I'm only being that generous because of Brolin's performance)

Jonah Hex was directed by Jimmy Hayward and is rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, disturbing images and sexual.

Theatrical Release: June 18, 2010

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